Change
How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but the light bulb has to really want to change.
How many humans does it take to change the world?
Only one, but she has to really want to change.
If you want to change the world, change the state.
If you want to change the state, change the city.
If you want to change the city, change the neighborhood.
If you want to change the neighborhood, change the family.
If you want to change the family, change yourself.
If you change yourself, you will change the world.*
And even that’s not enough, wanting to. You have to start, fall, get up, start again, fall, lick your wounds, get up, trip, fall, quit, scream, start again . . . ad nauseum.
And not only is there no guarantee of success, most of the teachers will tell you it’s almost impossible to succeed, at least in one lifetime.
So. Why bother?
Why not? What else is there to do?
Novels and bonbons?
Not for long.
The tiniest bit of awareness leads to another tiny bit of awareness, and awareness leads to discomfort, and discomfort leads to either action or death. Our choice.
They say we choose to be born and to whom and where and when. Wow, what a concept! After that, society spends twenty or so years beating the individuality and magic out of us. Then we spend another twenty or thirty years limping along as half people trying to succeed in the material world. Then, about halfway to the end, everything starts to itch, or ache, or drive us crazy, and we either ignore it or we start scratching or rubbing, driving our own selves crazy trying to find out who, what, how and why.
And then we begin to live in reverse, step by step trying to regain all the parts of ourselves that we’ve stuffed in the basement of our souls because those parts were unacceptable. And we’re surprised when the itches and aches and crazy-nesses don’t go away.
I’m changing, already! What more do you want? When do I get there? Where’s my ta-da moment?
Then you remember--there is no there. There is only here.
Then you read, there is no ta-da moment, only little hmmm . . . moments when you get the teeniest glimpse, dangling like a carrot in front of a whipped race horse, and you go charging off around the circle. Again.
If you want to change the world, change yourself.
No problem. Let me just finish changing this lead into gold first.
Same thing, says Pooh.
Both seem impossible and both are relentlessly attempted by stubborn humans, encouraged by sadistic gurus, jabbered about in self-help workshops and mooned about by crazy poets.
And even though the trick is to change back into who you really are, who you’ve really been all along, surprise! That doesn’t make it any easier.
Oh, hey. This is like so helpful, like people are really going to want to read this depressing stuff.
Yeah, right. They’d rather read good news, like the interesting things the government is doing or what new development is being proposed in the county.
Stop it you two.
Is there any good news?
Well, some people have made it.
And, we’re not alone in trying.
And, as I said before, there’s nothing better to do.
And, when you change yourself, when you accept who you really truly are, then you change the world--you help the whole world step toward accepting who it really is.
And the light bulb, too.
*Someone else said this but I don’t know who. If you do, please email me: agatha
© copyright Maggie Wilson, 4/21/2006
